Nothing Much..Boring!

Nothing much happened today. Woke up in the middle of the night, make that 3am to sleep in my mom's room cause there's a very strong presence in my room that does not allow me to sleep. For those who don't know, FYI, I can feel presence and sometimes see them. Sigh. My mom woke up too and switched on the fan in her room and switched off mine in my room. If you read the blog earlier on, Cinnamon needs to cool down. So I went back to my room and on the fan, blowing at her ONLY for THE WHOLE NIGHT. I went back to my room to sleep and funny thing is, IT had gone away. Maybe it got bored. LoL. Don't know.
Morning woke up, cooked breakfast and prepared to go school. My house almost caught fire. I put 2 bread in the oven to toast while I go bathe. I set it at a very low temperature and when I came out of the toilet, I smelled something burning. I rushed to the kitchen when I remembered I was toasting bread. By the time I got to the kitchen, there was smoke everywhere. Shit. First thing that came into my mind was how on earth am I going to explain to my mom? I switched off the oven and opened the oven door. Bad move. The kitchen was filled with more smoke. Double shit and oh no. I quickly pushed the clothes out and tried to clear the kitchen of smoke. Damn. I was so worried that the opposite block might call 995. It was that smoky. LoL. My mistake. That's why my mom's always worried when I cook. The last time, a similar case happened..not too long ago, about a month ago. I was cooking meat balls and turned on a low fire..I actually fell asleep. When I woke up, the pan was smoking..LoL. I'm that tired and absent minded.
I brought Cinnamon to school with me. I even brought her medicine cause she's better behaved outside than at home. I got clever and mixed her antibiotics with water to dissolve first, then add her flu syrup in before inserting to her mouth. Haha! Thing is I need to go buy medicine liaos. I wasted half the bottle of syrup yesterday night when I accidentally knocked it over the table. Sianz. Today she's better behaved than yesterday, where she attacks anyone that touches her. Her temperature did drop cause I left her in my workcell while I went to eat lunch and meet my supervisor. Nothing to do le so go home. She's now running around in my room, trying to cover my floortiles with her shit. And me? Stupidly clearing her shit after her.

Confused..Help Anyone?

I was feeling so confused for the past 2 weeks. I don't know what I want. Sometimes I get so irritated by him..sometimes I just want to give up. I've no idea what came over me. Stress? The bad impression that his parents are having on me? School? Friends? Sigh. When I get irritated easily, as in like *snap*, I'm irritated and angry, it's not a good sign actually. Don't know lah, well, I've overcome that phase. LoL. Thank God. I still love him though, just that whenever he discusses about us in the future as in marriage, I feel funny. Maybe I've no confidence in myself that he'll be with me that long or that I can actually wait for him in SG while he furthers his studies in Aussie. I've no idea. Let's just take a step at a time. I want to settle down..but I don't wish to wait that long..5 years is too long..not to say 6 or 7 years..I'm getting old. I'm a big sized woman with small thinking. I want to have a home, have a career and kids..but first I want to marry young and enjoy the time with my husband for maybe 2 years before having kids. I'm crazy? LoL. My friend got married when she was 16! Her kid now is 7 years old lehz..LoL..another of my classmate just got divorced 2 years back and has a 5 year old kid. That's life.

Men frm Mars, Women frm Venus

Anyone heard of this book before? It's by John Gray. It's very informational. I borrowed from my aunt about 4 years back. If I had read finish and share the info with Eggie then, we wouldn't had ended up like this today. Enemies. Ok, he's treating me like an enemy, and for me? I wouldn't mind being friends. Sometimes, seriously, I still do think of the happier times while we were together, which were lesser than the bad times we had. 3 years lehz. My first long relationship. My past 21 relationships ended with an average of 3-4 months? Longest then was only 9 months and shortest was only 3 days. LoL. It was a mistake from the beginning mah, so don't carry on the mistake lohz. Haha! Oh yah, Kevin's my 22nd..and shall be my last..hopefully.
Anyway, I was reading it in the toilet while doing business (I'm a bookworm! Don't blame me! I'd to read while doing business..) and I saw this chapter, How To Motivate the Opposite Sex. I saw a few phrases which I think made sense.
Quote from pg 43 of Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, published in 1992:' Men are motivated and empowered when they feel needed. Women are motivated and empowereed when they feel cherished'. It's so true lohz! FEMALES need to feel cherished before they are motivated to do anything. This is something that I'm actually feeling in my 8mth relationship with Kevin and something that I did not feel in my 3 YEARS relationship with Eggie. Please tell me how not to love Kevin more and more when I feel cherished?
Quoted on pg 44:'Martians(in the book, men are referred to as Martians and women as Venusians) have a win/lose philosophy-I want to win, and I don't care if you lose.. As long as each Martian took care of himself this formula worked fine. It worked for centuries, but now it needed to be changed. Giving primarily to themselves was no longer as satisfying. Being in love, they wanted th Venusians to win as much as themselves. Most of these Martian attitudes have a place in life, but this win/lose attitude becomes harmful in our adult relationships. If I(the author) seek to fulfill my own needs at the expense of my partner, we are sure to experience unhappiness, resentment and conflict. The secret of forming a successful relationship is for both partners to win'. Logical? It should be. This book was once a top selling book in New York and Singapore. If both parties win, I'm happy with winning, you're happy with winning, then there'll be no quarrels. Of course saying is cheap, to do it you actually have to have tolerance level of say, 200 out of 100? Haha. All these takes time de. People don't change overnight. Or rather, nobody can change if they don't want to, nagging doesn't help.
Quoted on pg 46:'Given the opportunity to prove his potential, a man expresses his best self. Only when he feels he cannot succeed does he regress back to his old selfish ways'. This describes Eggie perfectly. LoL. I kept setting high goals that he can't keep, so he turned nasty. LoL. It's over. I've learnt a good lesson in that. Nowadays, I still set pretty high expectations (I'm ugly, setting expectations and having him to keep up to it is actually an assurance that he loves me. Call me a sadist, I don't care. That's just me) but I don't really expect Kevin to keep up to them ALL the time. Just a gentle reminder along the way if he really wants to change, no more screamings and shoutings at my partner just cause he can't do a simple thing like cutting down on smoking. I feel cherished what. LoL.
Quoted on pg 46 still:'Not to be needed is a slow death for a man'. All the above are actually for females to see hor. Except for the first quote. Please hor ladies, if you think he's the one, make him feel as if you need him. If you don't need him, why be with him in the first place? If you love him yet don't need him that much, just pretend k? LoL. Joking. When you love someone, you actually need him..to share your happiness and sadness..your joy and sorrow, and of course your life. So ask yourself if you need the guy. If it's just for accompaniment, I can tell you that you're actually wasting both of your times. Need to know more whether you love a guy? Ring me up at my mobile and I'll set up a counselling session for you for a minimal fee of a cup of caramel frappocino @ Starbucks or Pure Chocolate @ Coffeebean.
This is for the guys. It's finally your turn! Quoted on pg 48:'A woman's tendency to be compulsive relaxes as she remembers that she is worthy of love-she doesn't have to earn it; she can relax, give less and receive more. She deserves it.' Females, do not, I repeat, DO NOT take it for granted k? For too much giving is tiring. To the above quote, I shall explain with the passage under the title Too Much Giving Is Tiring from the same page.
'To deal with their depression the Venusians were busy sharing their feelings and talking about their problems. As they talked they discovered the cause of their depression. They were tired of giving so much all the time. They resented always feeling responsible for one another. They wanted to relax and just be taken care of for a while. They were tured of sharing everything with others. They wanted to be special and possess things that were their own. No longer were they satisfied eing martyrs and living for others.
On Venus, they lived by lose/win (men is win/lose remember?) philosophy-"I lose so that you can win." As long as everyone made sacrifices for others, then everyone was taken care of. But after doing this for centuries the Venusians were tired of always caring about one another and sharing everything. They also were ready for a win/win philosophy.
Similarly, many women today are also tired of giving. They want time off. Time to explore being themselves. Time to care about themselves first. They want someone to provide emotional support, someone they dont have to take care of. The martians fit the bill perfectly.'
Shui boh? Shui right? Maybe after reading all these you feel as if this book is actually saying things that you've felt all these while. Well, what are you waiting for? Go buy the book lah! Better still, go borrow but not from me cause want to read on de k? There's actually alot of things I wanted to write but think today write very long liaoz. Maybe some of you skip here skip there also. Haha. Think tml bah..k lah..634pm liaoz. Time to play game. Wrote the blog for whole afternoon didn't have much time to play game. LoL. Take care you guys. To Kevin, I'm so proud of you and I want to tell you that I love you alot. I'm waiting for your return from outfield as impatiently as I should be. Love ya!