Ok, didn't chat at all today. Guess that's us ba. It kinda set in liaoz, it's like if I'm together with him, it'll still make me independant. As I've said to many of my friends, when a girl is too independant, what's the use of a bf? My feelings for him is like..becoming stale le leh. If I am waiting (even I don't know if I am or not), I don't think will wait that long le ba. I rather like a guy who likes me back..yx if you're reading this, err..also don't know how you should react. I enjoys being with him, but sometimes he gives me the feeling that I'm giving him more attn than he is giving to me. He's sweet and all, and he's one guy that I can't bring myself to be angry for long. As I've said earlier, fuck it fuck it fuck it! Will try to think things thru during class chalet when I'm high. That's when my stupid brain can function properly on this issue. I don't wish to drag any longer, don't wish to be a lost soul or just be a fling to another anymore....
Today no school, no life. That's me. Stayed home the whole day. Woke up at 10+. So early..I must be crazy. Wait, I did go out, for about 1 hour plus. Woke up, watched abit of cartoon and begin to slack my day away w/o studying for my term test paper which is tomorrow. Sianz. Just not in the mood to study lehz. Was playing my piano, and I felt this urge to learn piano again. Beginning to realised why Fiona(my piano teacher for a day only) insisted I start from grade 5 when I'm actually in grade 7. I can't play for pits! I suck big time! Argh. Practised my sclaes (only in C, D and E major) before playing the songs. It did helped abit, now then realised the importance of scales. It makes your fingers nimble. Mine are a little stiff, can't really move my fingers that fast anymore. No wonder last time my piano teacher, Miss Chan, forbid me to play with Monkey Bars and sort, which tends to harden the fingers. *Sigh*
Anyways, Uncle TC and his family came over for dinner. Cousin Wee Kuok came over too, for dinner that is. My cousin, who's 12yo, has a hp!! OMG. Last time not so close with them de, but now closer cause got "gong tong dian", the 2 elder brothers both play GB, which I play, they both like Archies, which I have and like and they both sort of look up to me. Haha! Since I ate before they come and I was craving for a puff, I messaged Andre and Wenhui see whether they want meet up or not. Walking distance from my house to their house lah. Both of them stay opp Macs that area. Stupid Andre sleeping, but must thank him else won't be meeting up with Wenhui also. He kept me entertained for 1hour plus, making me laugh and make me pek cek. Keep suaning me and all. We did talked about Kev, and seriously, it was only about 2 sentences or so. He told me that after reading my blog, he can see that I'm waiting for Kev. Hmmz, I told him I don't know and he keep insisting that I am. Well, maybe it's used to having Kev around liao ba. As the saying goes, outta sight outta mind. My principle in a relationship is the guy must like me more than I like him. I know I know, I'm selfish. But hey, isn't everybody like that? I'm kinda stuck lohz, I'm scared of accepting Wenhui(if he did sound me) cause I'm afraid of hurting him yet I'm scared of accepting Kev(which will neva happen) cause I might be the one getting hurt in the end. Argh! Fuck it fuck it fuck it!! Concentrate on my term tests! All shit happens during tests/exams.
Him