Sick le.. At the doctor's.. Guys, I missed you! Why Doesn't He Get It? The things I want
Why I feeling cold lehz? Cause I sick le. Feel so weak now, yet I'm burning with anger. Argh. This morning skipped TCS, supposed to study for ICAPP quiz de, but when about to leave house go school study at 1015, I felt my stomach churning. Uh oh, not good. Went toilet and did my business, came out and left my house. While walking to the bus stop, my stomach hurts and so did my lower left abs. Stupid sharp pain that had left me so long ago has come back to haunt me. Shit. Decided to take MC since I don't feel like failing the quiz. Yesterday night really cry till pillow wet wet and cry till I fell asleep. Didn't have the time to study, and morning got this kind of shit. Na bey. Called Sue cause she's suposed to pass me $130 for the chalet and told her I'm going see doctor. Took a cab over to school. Went to her lab and Jacky (Tong Liang) poked me in my side. Piangz. Pain. Told him not to do that. Think I really look sick cause Firdhaus and Alvin says I don't look alright. Even Jianyu also said that. Shit. Sue passed me the money and I hung around school for awhile. I realised I missed hanging out with them. Mon I've met up with HL for awhile nia to buy something, Tues & Wed we didn't have lunch, and today's Thurs..I really missed them. I missed crapping with them. I've so many things inside of me and I feel as though I'm gonna burst. I need someone to talk to. I don't want to cry everyday. Sigh.
Anyways, went back home around 1130 and took a cab, cause my side was hurting too much and that stupid bus didn't come. Waited for 10min before I decided to take a cab. Went to doctor and told her I had diarrhoea, and when she pressed on my side, it was hurting. She told me to lift my leg and I felt numbness in my lower left abs. The doc said if the pain continues, I better go for a checkup. She told me if sharp pain on right (which happens occasionally), it's appendics, and if it's on the left (happens frequently), it might be an infection in the bladder, womb or big intestine. Ouch. She gave me a day MC and asked if I wanted another day. I told her it's ok. I need to be in school tomorrow. Went home and bought tidbits. I know..I'm not supposed to eat tidbits. Well, I had what I deserved. I vomitted out the tidbits. Saded. Waste my money. Drank alot of water today, but I just keep having the runs. I feel so weak now. Just cooked porridge for my family and had eaten my medicine, but that doesn't stop me from feeling sorry for myself...*poor thing*
Guys as in not guys literally. I missed my friends!! The last time we really went out was last Sat, 11th Sep. The time I had with them was so short. I really missed them. I missed crying and sobbing infront of them. I missed hugging them. I missed their touch. I missed drinking coffee and being crazy, forgetting who I am and all my troubles when I'm with them. I really missed listening to them nagging at me. I missed telling them what's new with me. I missed telling them my troubles and having them there to solve my probs for me. I missed going down to One Fullerton and drinking tea and talking abt our pasts. I missed giving IQ questions and receiving nonsensical answers back. I missed suaning Sue and HL and kena suan by the rest back. I missed those late night cab ride that I have to share with them. I missed smoking when and when I feel like it with them. I missed having them give in to me all the time. I missed screaming and shouting and yelling together with them. I missed drinking with them. I missed those nights talking about our future and what we want to do in life. I missed having the chance to know them better through those talks. I missed bitching about pop idols, lecturers and friends with them. I missed going KTV with them. I missed laughing and joking with them. Most importantly, I missed them. Guys!! Suefong, Huiling, Jacky, Eugene, Chan Yeh, Jack, Weiliang!! I missed you guys!!!! Especially Suefong, Huiling, Jacky and Eugene. You guys were always there to crap around with me when we go One Fullerton. And you guys were the ones who always give in to me. I MISSED YOU!! *Sob* Now I need you guys..can you guys spare me some time to lend me your ears and shoulder to cry on? I really need you guys right now..I'm goin thru the roughest patch in my life right now..HELP!! I want to go drinking, I want to go smoking, I want to forget all my troubles!!!!!!! Guys..let me stop missing you k? Just meet up with me..after your SIP.....before I burst.....
Had a quarrel with him just now. Over msn though. He read my blog just now. Men are funny creatures, when you want them to read they don't, and when you don't expect them to read, they do. Sigh. He told me he wants me to hang out with his friends. Isn't that what I'm doing recently? I've been neglecting my friends. As I'd said earlier on in another entry, before we were together, I'm always hanging out with my friends; now that we're together, I'm always hanging out with HIS friends. My friends are cool about it, but frankly speaking, I'm starting to miss hanging out with them. His friends aren't that crazy as my group, they don't slack as much as my group and of course, I feel more comfortable in my group. Maybe that's the difference between students and working adults. I really feel like giving up sometime. I really can't take it. I'm feeling stressed up with school, with family, with projects and quizzes, and he's not giving me an easy time either. I want him to be happy, and I know he's happier with his friends, so I accompany him and his friends. But everytime he thinks and feels that I'm bored. I'm not bored. I try to keep myself entertained. I do I really do! The main point is, with me having such little time for him, maybe I'm being selfish but I do really wish that those little time I have to be spent with him alone. He meets up with them almost everyday, so what's it to him if I just ask for a day or 2 alone with him? Ppl says the first 2 mths are honeymoon periods, and that couples usually do the romantic stuffs and always hang out with each other alot during this period. Well, I don't have honeymoon. For the past 1 mth, I've been hanging out with him and his friends most of the time. The only time we are together is when he comes over to my place, he drives me around or when I'm in his house. Note, it's house..not place, cause his friends will come over at night to his place and chat, then there goes our "er ren shi jie". Kev, if by any chance you're reading this, it's not I don't want to hang out with your friends, but please be fair to me. I need some time alone with you too. And at the rate I'm hanging out with you and your pals, I'm losing time hanging out with my pals too. You want me to hang out and know more about your friends, likewise I hope you do the same with mine too. And I do hope you'll set aside sometime for us, yep, just the two of us to be together. Coz I feel as though I'm sharing my bf..seriously, if there's a need for you to meet your friends, go ahead. I'm ok with it. But bringing me along everytime makes me kind of tired. I want you to hang out with my friends too. Do you get my point now? I WANT YOU TO HANG OUT WITH MY FRENS TOO, AND SET ASIDE AT LEAST ONE DAY A WEEK JUST FOR THE 2 OF US. That should be clear enough. I'm just so tired of everything right now..how I wish I can don't care and just leave everything lying around in a mess.......
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What I want now lehz? So many things. Let me see...
- want to go chinese garden see lanterns
- want to watch resident evil
- want to watch a cinderella story
- want to watch princess diary 2
- want to watch 13 going on 30
- want to watch qian ji bian 2
- want to watch xin jing cha gu shi
- want to watch anacondas
- want to watch white chicks
- want to go turf club
- want to go drinking
- want to go smoking
- want to go clubbing
- want to go skating
- want to finish my exams
- want to finish my projects
- want to go m'sia
- want to go shopping
- want to do SIP
- want to redecorate my rm
- want to buy a new comp
- want to have new hp
- want to slack around
- want to be with my frens
- want kev to be happy
- want to get well
- want to learn guitar
- want to be happy...